Burlesque Hall of Fame Weekend!!! WAS THAT THE FUNNEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED?? Yes… yes I do think so!!!! I don’t even know where to start with this one!! So much fun and friends and booze and burlesque!!! THE best time ever!!!!!!! People, if you did not go- I shame you!! You missed the amazing!!! But I’ll do my best to fill you in!!
Day 1
So Wednesday!!! Thats a day early but we were being prepared!!! I effing made it past the border!!! OH MY GOD HOORAY!!! I feel like I got away with a crime!! I seriously was telling everyone what a criminal mastermind I was all day but really I’m probably just effing lucky. Whatever- I made it!!! I want a parade about it but we get breakfast wraps instead!!
We fly! We check in! Its Vegas! It stinks like my Dads house! Cigarettes and carpets, YAY!!! Melody Sweets has a real job being a Burlesque performer in ye olde Vegas!! YAYYY! They are sponsoring the festival so we get free tickets to see her show, Absinthe! Double YAY!!!! She did super great, I fall in love with cute cute boys that do gymnastics, and SOMEBODY we know falls asleep because he is so drunk. YAYYY!
Shuttle Bus to Absinthe!
Day 2
POOL PARTY!!!! We make friends with Bambi Galore from NY! Did everyone make friends with her because I’m pretty sure she is the friendliest friend around!!! I vote Bambi for Miss Congeniality. There were hats and drinks and sun!!! We also managed to get stretchy!! Myself, Melody, and Lola Frost didn’t even have to try hard to convince other people to join in!!!
stretchy squad
Vava tells me she bought 75 dollars worth of booze. I later find her topless and tipsy in the hotel room. I know then and there it will be an epic weekend. We pretty up and head to the Innovators, Shakers, and Innovators Night. Can I say how excited I was for this? YAY FOR THE WEIRDOS!!!!! Seriously, I was stoked that the hall had chosen to include all aspects of Burlesque, paying tribute to those that put the Neo in Neo-Burlesque. For realz!! Everyone was effing amazing!!
The boys were show stoppers- Ray Gunn played off all his clothes with a bow string, Waxie Moon’s number was one of my complete favs creating some complete art with his Halo, and Johnny Porkpie, as Evil Bastard put it, gave hope to those who are more bros than boys for Boylesque.
Bee Tiny Tot and Leroi the Girl Boi both win the energy award!! Both of this performers have so much charisma and make me sooooo HAPPY!!! AHH I LOVE them!!!!!
I LOVE BEE!!!!!
Inga Ingenue was perfect. The end. Seriously- super loved to see a dancer flawlessly make the transition to stripper. The combo was HOT! No wondering why she won Viva Las Vegas this year!!
Remember that time Miss Charlamay lifted her entire body up with her mouth?? And did some sort of freaky backbend????? ON SOME SORT OF MAGIC STICK??? WTF?? Way to make me feel inferior as a human.. but it was AWESOME!!
Props for innovation for Siren Santina as a giant TURKEY and to Surlie Temples literal unraveling of a Sweater to Weezer’s the Sweater Song.
Everyone was great but I effing loved Trixie Little’s Jailbait number. Like effing lovedd it!!! It was hot, it was campy, it was bendy!! Everything I adore about Miss Little!!!
And of course, Julie Atlas Muz. Blacklight. Glowstick came outta where???? OH MY GOD!!!!!!
I then proceded to be the drunkest person on earth and win friends and influence people by throwing myself on the carpet and saying help help so they would have to pay attention to me. I’m pretty sure it worked. Party People and Pictures Below —>
Day 3
The hangover. Owwwwww!!! But we went to the Burlesque Bazaar at the hotel and then the Fantastic Swap Meet! OH MY GOD!! THE SWAPS!! Seriously, everyone must go there. I got my first fake hair. I was vary vary happy about said hair. I haz a hair!!! Then it was pool and more stretchy!!! Very proud of everyone who kept up with Team Booty!! Yah!!
Then, Legends night. They were all the greatest things ever. How?? How can you not weep at Camille 2000’s fan dance that she dedicated to her husband who had passed away?? How can you not want to put Toni Elling in your pocket and keep her their forever?? How can you not be so proud of Judith Stein, OUR GRAND BEAVER (!!!!), who did so well!!!! I was so happy and proud and excited to share this time with our legends- and to watch and learn and love!!!! Love, Love, LOVE!!! Shout outs also to Tiffany Carter- always stunning and to Haji! Damn!!! She sure knew how to work it!! The after party was themed neon and we had a plan. A PANTS PARTY PLAN!!!!! SOOOOOOO many people came in our pants!!! Our record was 9 and 1/2 people in the pants!! I laughed so hard the entire night. You wanna have fun?? Bring your giant pants!!!!
Pants Party!!
9 1/2!!!!
Day 4
Competition!! Our racks arrived!! Seriously- The Razzle Tassel gals and I felt we had already won considering all of us and the props somehow made it!! YAYY! And then we teched. And then we freaked!! That stage is the DEVIL!!! Seriously!! A GIANT PLASTIC DEVIL STAGE!!!!! Sooooooooo slippy!!!!!! I hope that maybe next year (my humble suggestion) there could be some dance flooring put down on top?? Or a bag of roisin somewheres?? We figured out that water on the shoes worked ok but I’m serious about it being a devil stage. We ate, we stretched, we got pretty!! I missed everybody in Debut but had fun backstage with everybody!! Serious thanks to Cherry Cheesecake, Dia Blow, David Bishop and the rest of the crew for all their hard work backstage!! You guys are amazing!!! We do our number and I.. am.. so.. HAPPY!! Well after I watched it on a digital camera but we did pretty good!! Evil Bastard is drunk. That drunk guy you wanted to punch? He was with us. He’s sorry. I make it back to the audience in time to watch all the boys and the Queen category. The boys were AWESOME!! Captain Kidd had the most energy and sass ever and that was before he started being the greatest at hula hoops. He won. HAIL!!!!!
Everyone in the Queen category was really strong! Anna Fur Laxis had a neato magic curtain that went up and down revealing more and more! I also really liked CoCo Letrics belly dance infused number. DAYUM!! All I can say about that. Dayum indeed!!!
Also loved the weirdo numbers from Ms Tickle and Nastie Canasta! Ms Tickle strode out with this epic coat that keep going and going eventually becoming a red carpet!! YES! And to finally see Nastie’s car alarm fan dance!! So stoked!! I also loved Ophilia Flames express yourself number with a photocopier and photos of said expression being projected behind her! I thought it was super fun!!
Mangler did awesome and that stargazer gown of Lily Verlaine’s? Wowza!! Roxi outdid her performance at the VIBF with her farewell number. I could tell she was having so much fun!!!! At last, who will it be??? INDIGO BLUE!! FUCK YES!!!!!!!! So deserved!! She gave an absolutely beautiful performance and is basically the greatest person alive!!! It was perfect!!!! LouLou D’vil won Best Debut and those amazing Stage Door Johnnies won Best Group!!! More dancing, more drunk!! Happy! Happy! Happy!!!
Sunday
Pool Party!! Pool Party!!! We brought water balloons and were absolute brats!! We told the Johnnies we wanted a picture with them, made them pose with us, then smashed balloons on them yelling Congrats!!! HAHAHAHHAH!!! HHAHAHAHAH!! I told you I was a criminal mastermind!!!!
Gotcha!
Oh we are so High-larious!!!! There were a few sharks, an octopus and lots of happy people. We were oh so tired, but we made sure to make it to the last of the nights, the Superstar Sunday Closing Gala and Tournee Screening. Hosted by Nadine Dubois and Naughty Pierre it was a star filled cast!! I really liked Nadine as a host!!! Why did I not know about this awesome lady before??? Highlights were performances from Father McTigger and the rest of the Boylesque choir. Oh sweet god, ask someone about this… and Dirty was absolutely fantastic!!!! Such a superstar for REAL!!! Trixie and Monkey were hilarious as fortune tellers and I thought Kalani’s traditional Hula dance number was just beautiful. We stuck around for Tournee and at the after party, it was Violets turn to get crazzeee!! She was Indigo’s biggest “fan” flapping her dress at her to make sure our highness kept cool and composed! There was a full on a dance circle and I’m pretty sure her majesty did the reverse worm in a sequin mini dress!!?? FUCK YES!!!!
Long story short?? Best weekend ever.
